Not wanting to let go...

OK, for those that have told me that it's not that hard to let their children grow up, are very wrong. My little boy, is fixing to turn three, and I don't want him to turn another year older. It hadn't been that long ago that he was a little tiny baby boy. That I had waited very patiently for all my life. I know all mother's ask this question "Where did the time go". I honestly don't know where the time has went, because one min. he was a baby and now he his a toddler. I just wish I could freeze time and have a few more years of my little baby. My son and my husband are the loves of my life. I prayed to God for both of them. God has made me learn about patience. I wanted to have a boyfriend in school, but all the guys wanted to just be friends. So when I got out of high school I meet my husband in collage. Two years later we where married. We wanted children, that was a big reason why we married. We loved children. He has several brothers and sisters. I just have one sister. But we knew we wanted to share our life with our children. So again when we wanted to have children, God wasn't ready for us to have any. So we patiently waited. It took me a solid year to get pregnant. I had a good pregnancy, I was healthy. Then I had him and he had several medical problems. So do you see why it's hard for me to not let go of my little tiny baby. Not wanting to let go is my fear right now, I will , It's just going to be very hard for me. Because I really don't know if there will be anymore children in our life, I just don't know what God has in store for my life. I just want to hang on to what we got right now. It just hurts!!!

Getting Older...

I know, I am behind in blogging. I just can't keep up with my blog. There just seems to be no end of my life slowing down. I just got back from another trip to Branson, I should prob. move up there. This makes my forth trip. And each time, I have seen something different. This time was the Christmas trip. It's only Nov. 5 and I'm ready to put my Christmas out. We got to see all kinds of lighting displays. So we can now count down day's till Christmas I think it's now 50 day's till Christmas. I'm sooooo not ready. The problem is Carson's birthday is the 23 of this month, then we turn around and Christmas is the 25. Not much of a brake. I was more into looking at how people decorated this year at branson. I have got so many ideas, I just wish it didn't go so fast, so we could enjoy Christmas like we used to. Getting older is sure though. We are so wrapped up in all that we do, we can't ever enjoy it. As soon as Christmas gets here, it will be all over. I just wish life would slow down, just a little.

Happy Birthday to Me....

Yeah, I'm 29, Yesterday was my birthday!!! It started off really good. Got a good morning kiss from my son, and husband. They both told me they Loved me, and that just made my morning. Well the day progressed. By noon, I was wanting to just go back to bed and get up again. Ever thing was screwed up at work. Just about every piece of paper we pick up there was something wrong with it. Plus, I miss birthday girl, crashed the system at work. I have no idea what happened, it just decided to crash on me. I got very emotional (crying). Because, I work for my Dad and Mom. My Dad is a very hard person to read. He wants the best for girls. I to be honest have not done my best. It is a very hard thing to explain but I have always tried to impress my Dad. I let him down all the time. I know I let him down because he never says anything to me. That's all I ever wanted was to be the light in my Dad's eye's. And I guess since I am still working for him that feeling of wanting to impress him still stands. I started working for day since I was 14 and I'm still here. I drop out of collage to get married, and I know that was disappointing. It's just that I'm secure here, I'm stuck in a shell, and I don't want to change. Or that's how I feel right now. Anyway I just don't wont him to be disappointed anymore in me than he already is. And here I crashed the system. So anyway, It was a emotional roller coaster yesterday. It got better my mom planed a supper at a Colton's. My Uncle and Aunt came in from Indiana. So they where there, also my sister came. And low and behold, my Dad walks in the door. What did I tell you my Dad is a very hard person to read. Anyway feelings so far of being 29. Happy, Upset, Glad, and Regret. Happy to be 29, Thanks you God for giving me one more year to be older. Upset that I screwed up the computer. Glad that my family took me out for supper last night, and they where all there. Regret that this all had to happen when I'm a year older. So all I've got left to say, Happy Birthday to Me!!!!

This is our Life...

OK, I know, it's been awhile since I have blog. But we have been very busy. Two weeks ago my husband and I, got to perform for our home church. Nothing big, we just put together some songs that we sing as solo's. We where very honored and touched by the invitation to come and share. We just felt the spirit of God move over us. We have never done this before, so it was a good practice night for us. It went fine, it's just we kept picking up a football game on our monitor. Not a good thing when it comes through while your singing. It turned out better than what we expected. We proved to ourselves that this is what God has blessed us to do. Sing, Praise and Worship God.
So that happened, next event in our lives was my Mom's 52 birthday. We celebrated her birthday by taking her shopping and eating at Olive Garden. While we went shopping, I got a little of a start on Carson's 3rd birthday coming up in a few months. His theme this year is trains. So we are doing Thomas the Train. I didn't realize that there was so much stuff that went along with Trains. Anyway, I just can't believe that he will be 3 in Nov. it's very exciting because he is getting so big and smart. But on the other hand, he's not my baby, he is my big boy now. But that's life, changing very fast.
We also got to go to Pumpkin Hollow this past weekend. Carson got to feed the goats, feed the chicken's and pet the rabbits. He got to ride horses, go on a Hayride. And ride a train, walk through corn mazes. And to top off the day Carson got to chase a Pig. He didn't know what to do and I felt sorry for him. But before we left, we got to pick out a pumpkin. Got our pictures made in the pumpkin patch. We just had a very fun filled day.
As the year end creeps upon us, there is still so much to see and do. We have another trip to Branson, Thanksgiving and Birthday within a few weeks. So we will face it head on and reflect on how we live day by day, because This is our Life....

Autumn Day's...

I love it! The time is here for Autumn again. I love the season, mainly because my birthday is in October. But I love the colors, the leaves, the pumpkins. I can't wait to take my son to pick out his pumpkin for the year. I myself have got a pumpkin every year from the first year that we got married. So when Carson was born, we made a tradition to get Carson a pumpkin. The first year we got a little one because he was just ten months old. Anyway, we go to a pumpkin farm called Pumpkin Hollow. We go and spend the day. He gets to ride pony's, feed the goats, chases pigs and they have Hayrides. We don't live on a farm so, it's all new for him. Anyway I just love this time of year. I put out fall things in my house last night. The oranges, yellow's, greens, and red's. They are all just beautiful. So I'm glad the Autumn Day's are here again. It's one of my favorite times of the year.

Forgiving and Forgetting...

OK, it's been a few weeks since I blogged. Since then, I've been really busy, getting together a ladies night at our church. We had it Friday night it was so worth getting it together. It was a very moving night, both spiritually and emotional. We only had about ten that showed up, but the ladies opened up and we had a very good discussion. The theme was Growing in God's Fragrance. We discussed about forgiving and forgetting those that have hurt your. And just being a rose that will stand above all others for Christ. Myself it is so hard to forgive someone, when they have hurt you very badly. I have gone threw it, both family and friends. Some have hurt me sometime or another. I really try not to dwell on it, because they really don't mean to. It's just the devil tries to tear each other apart. And God have me a sensitive heart. I've always been that way for some reason. I just want to be a pleasing person. But for some reason it always back fires at me. I try to forgive and forget how people talk to me or how they grip at me. But God doesn't erase the memory, so it's just that much harder to forget the people that have hurt you. But God forgives us daily for our mistakes, so we must try to forgive and forget the people that have hurt us. Let us be a shining light for him, become a beautiful rose that will rise up from the ground from a thorny bush. And become the most fragrant and beautiful red rose for Christ.

Finding each other...

Well we went back to Branson this past weekend. We had fun it was me and my husband. We stayed three nights and four day's. It was nice to get away, just with my husband. I think we have been together for so long we forgot, how to be husband and wife. We are going on nine years of marriage and we have kinda got off track. So that was the focus this weekend to find each other again. I found him, and I hope he found me. We talked about things and we both still agree on is what our marriage is all about. The love we have for each other and the love of God all connected. With out the love of God in a marriage, the love for each other will eventually die. I believe with all my heart, that is how me and my husband have made it for long. We have both been raised in a good Christian Homes. We have parents that love each other and love God. So It has been good that we have good influences in our lives. We have seen our parents go up and down in their relationships. But there main focus has been the Lord! I'm not perfect and neither is my husband. We know what the commitment was nine years ago, we both took our marriage very serious. We have had our share of trails and temptations. But we always come back and find each other. I believe I married my best friend, my partner, and my soul mate. May God continue to Bless us as a family and as a strong marriage. Amy Loves David......